For all my sins I am a frequent reader and occasional poster on an entity we will simply refer to as ‘The Forums.’ Now as we all know this entity is prone to fits and bizarre hyperbole even at the best of times and certain sections of it have fallen deep into the cesspools of dumb for a while. In these weekly-ish articles I will document my journeys through some of these cesspools and drag up what I feel to be the most egregious or simply pointless threads and posts I find. All posters will be kept anonymous here because the purpose of this article isn’t to call people out on what they say, everyone makes mistakes, but to try and make The Forums a better place for all to inhabit. From time to time I will also give a shout out to someone who made a post that I felt achieved this goal best, because we can’t be negative all the time.
Disclaimer: Topics will be heavily biased towards sections of the forums I visit most, sorry!
So without further ado:
Troll Players Won’t move on!
Given how the Troll Forums have been for the past 6+ months this could have been a lot worse but there is already a thread discussing what models people would like to see in the next book. As a general rule I don’t dislike these threads, but there are two problems here:
- All of the model ideas are basically the same ones that have been tossed about since before Wrath came out. Come on guys, an 8 point reach heavy is never happening, move on.
- Gargantuans is still fresh off the presses. Why are we wasting energy talking about future releases that will never happen when we could be talking about models that will be out in the next few months. There isn’t even a thread about Grim2 on the front page of the Troll Forums as I’m writing this. Why aren’t we doing Dojo like mad for what will be one of our best warlocks? Skorne have a massive Makeda3 Dojo thread, as much as it pains me to say it, please be more like the Skorne forums for this!
Most frustrating part: Players asking for old Mark I rules to be brought back on new models. It’s never going to happen guys, PP took the +2 RAT Fell Call away from us, they’re not bringing it back. They also took away KW’s 4+ tough mini-feat so stop asking for 4+ tough on a unit. Move on!
Runes of War (Doomy1 tier) is actually bad!
The thread I learned this from actually started out about how Runes of War is awesome and most of the posts were about that. Unfortunately after a while people started saying that the list had problems with Cryx, Menoth and Circle mostly because those lists ignored Runeshapers. Somehow the discussion of what is probably Trolls best all-comers list turned into making it look like it had bad match ups against all the currently dominant factions. I made a long post in the thread, I’ll spare you gentle reader that treatment, but lets just say that Runes of War is great against Circle….and Cryx…and probably decent against Menoth. Seriously, the list has 45 points of not Runeshapers, you’ll be fine if they’re not doing all your heavy lifting.
Trend of Sadness! Non-Competitive Play in the Merc Forums
There is a general sort of impression from the Merc forums that Merc players don’t have to be competitive to have fun and in fact just don’t want to try and be competitive. There are a few threads now that look to be trending away from it so hopefully all will be well by next week. Mercenaries have been sort of bad for a long time but the last two books have given us the tools we need to be good! Please don’t stifle the competitive spirit of new Mercenary players and lets finally win some stuff! No one in the forum is being a jerk or anything (The Mercenary forums are super friendly) it’s just that there is very little serious Dojo with actual play experience going on in the forum. Now I’m guilty of not playing my Mercs enough at the moment to really participate but I’d like to see some threads discussing more competitive play alongside the more casual threads. Come on guys, this is our/your year to be awesome!
Hero Post of the Week! Mountain King Tactica Troll Forums
Unfortunately the full post is way to long to include in this article but it’s post #26 if you want to check it out. Definitely an awesome contribution to the forum discussion. I long ago stopped reading Mountain King threads due to them just being lots of troll (the bad kind) posts inter-mixed with inside jokes spawned in the depths of other Mountain King threads (can the Bruce thing just die, please?). This poster (who will remain anonymous unless he doesn’t want to) basically called everyone out on it and suggested that maybe for the actual tactica thread being written people could try and be constructive. New players read these things and we don’t want to mislead/troll them, they’re like children we’re supposed to take care of. If there’s one thing I love more than positive posts its Tactica threads and this Hero Post elegantly combined both. Bravo good sir!
Disclaimer the Second: I don’t dislike or despise anyone who wrote the posts/started the threads I mention here. I love each and every poster in the PP forums, except you. You know what you did. But sometimes, it’s hard so I need to purge that forum anger, this is the result.
Disclaimer C: This may not be a weekly segment, that might just be a catchy name.
Stay Classy Forums!